Marriage is honourable in all

This is a very important message which every married couple and every spinster should read, and is inspired from Bro. Shyam Kishore's message. I have made this into 3 parts (I, II, III), so that it is easier to read. Please pass on this message to as many as possible and read prayerfully.

This deals with –

significance of marriage in GOD’s consideration,

who can overcome hurdles in  marriage,

selecting right partners,

and law regarding divorce as per Moses and what Jesus said.

Part I

1 Peter 2:24

²⁴ Who his own self bare our sins in his own body on the tree, that we, being dead to sins, should live unto righteousness: by whose stripes ye were healed.

We are saved so that we should live for righteousness. But how can we live for righteousness?

What are the circumstances that can lead to a believer falling in sin? When is the believer bound to fall in sin or fail to live for righteousness?

The answers are very simple but these are also basis for powerful weapons of satan to attack a believer.

1.      When a believer do not pray

2.      When a believer do not read Bible (do not read the Word of GOD)

Just as food is for stomach, word is for our spirituality and to defend from worldly temptations and sins. Unless we eat this spiritual food, we will not be able to withstand temptations and problems in this world (which is of devil).

When we pray we build up relationship with GOD and it becomes difficult for Satan to enter this dominion.

Psalms 11:3

If the FOUNDATIONS be destroyed, what can the righteous do?

If the foundations are destroyed what can the righteous do? Foundations are destroyed when a righteous person does not read Bible every day (OR) does not take the spiritual food everyday and maintain relationship with GOD (pray). Then the purpose of GOD for man is understood wrongly or interpreted wrongly. A believer will be swayed by what different preachers are preaching and even a righteous man will fall away leading him to uncertainty and perplexity. Man gets carried away to follow his own rules and vain thoughts thinking they are from GOD. Satan is working at this (root) level to destroy foundations such that its mission to lead man away from GOD becomes easy.

We should always refer and study Bible asking GOD to teach us and reveal mysteries from Bible, help us evaluate the preaching or messages that we hear. Bible is like a mirror reflecting our own image as it is. A person whether rich or poor, young or old, man or woman, teacher/professional/politician/preacher…, be it anyone, one may appear very decent, helpful and very good to the outside world but GOD sees a person inside out (inside the heart), what the person is actually in thought and deed, whether the person is acting for the world’s sake or is it real.

When we read Bible, we can understand our sins and faults and we can ask Jesus to remove them. We can grow more and more powerful every day and more personal with our Jesus who bore all our iniquities and sicknesses on the cross and is now sitting at the right hand of GOD interceding and agreeing for us in our prayers. Thus whatever we ask in HIS name we will get.

Proverbs 1:22

²² How long, ye simple ones, will ye love simplicity? and the scorners delight in their scorning, and fools hate knowledge?

If we love GOD then we should love wisdom. We should test ourselves whether we are loving wisdom or not. If we are not, then we do not love GOD also.

GOD is calling and asking all who are far off, to repent and come near HIM and tarry not any longer. JESUS is WISDOM and the wisdom obtained through JESUS is valuable and precious. This will set a person free from many problems in this world.

Proverbs 1:29

²³ Turn you at my reproof: behold, I will pour out my spirit unto you, I will make known my words unto you.

²⁴ Because I have called, and ye refused; I have stretched out my hand, and no man regarded;

²⁵ But ye have set at nought all my counsel, and would none of my reproof:

²⁶ I also will laugh at your calamity; I will mock when your fear cometh;

²⁷ When your fear cometh as desolation, and your destruction cometh as a whirlwind; when distress and anguish cometh upon you.

²⁸ Then shall they call upon me, but I will not answer; they shall seek me early, but they shall not find me:

²⁹ For that they hated knowledge, and did not choose the fear of the LORD:

If a person do not consider GOD’s calling and still refuse wisdom then the person will fall for the treacherous Satan’s vileness and GOD (yes, our loving JESUS) is saying that HE will laugh at the person’s calamity and HE will not answer when the person calls to HIM.

Many people have the wrong notion that JESUS always forgives and always loves though they continue in their sins and just ask GOD to forgive. For those people this is an eye opening message. Without repentance (regret), it is hard to be forgiven and hard to please GOD. When one continues in the same sins, GOD is grieved very much to the extent that he allows sickness and other problems to creep into the person’s life so that it could change the person and bring to repentance.

Proverbs 2:10-15

¹⁰ When wisdom entereth into thine heart, and knowledge is pleasant unto thy soul;

¹¹ Discretion shall preserve thee, understanding shall keep thee:

¹² To deliver thee from the way of the evil [man], from the man that speaketh froward things;

¹³ Who leave the paths of uprightness, to walk in the ways of darkness;

¹⁴ Who rejoice to do evil, [and] delight in the frowardness of the wicked;

¹⁵ Whose ways [are] crooked, and [they] froward in their paths:

Wisdom protects and delivers us. Wisdom will protect us the whole day.

Sometimes we see Christians compromising to marry persons for their wealth or good looks or job or because of love. If wisdom does not guide a person, the person marries another person without wisdom. That marriage becomes the foundation for many generations to get ruined or lost.  A person devoid of wisdom is one who is devoid of word and prayer. But one should pray that the Holy Spirit should guide us properly when reading the word and not allow any misinterpretations to creep into our minds. There are many wrong preachings and misinterpretations pertaining to word, that is why Bible cautions us to be alert and to ask GOD help us understand the word correctly.

A person who has the word has the Holy Spirit guiding him/ her and would not attempt to take a wrong step, because wisdom cautions the person and counsels about the looming problems of a wrong step taken.

When we read this word daily which is our food, then we will walk in health, prosperity and peace.

Enlightenment caused by wisdom gives discernment, understanding, and knowledge.

Proverbs 2:16-19

¹⁶ To deliver thee from the strange woman, [even] from the stranger [which] flattereth with her words;

¹⁷ Which forsaketh the guide of her youth, and forgetteth the covenant of her God.

¹⁸ For her house inclineth unto death, and her paths unto the dead.

¹⁹ None that go unto her return again, neither take they hold of the paths of life.

The word ‘COVENANT ‘is very significant to GOD. Nowadays youngsters are leaving and forsaking this covenant that GOD created, and are divorcing their partners.  We will see how important this covenant is to GOD.

Malachi 2:14, 15

¹⁴ Yet ye say, Wherefore? Because the LORD hath been witness between thee and the wife of thy youth, against whom thou hast dealt treacherously: yet [is] she thy companion, and the wife of thy covenant.

¹⁵ And did not he make one? Yet had he the residue of the spirit. And wherefore one? That he might seek a godly seed. Therefore take heed to your spirit, and let none deal treacherously against the wife of his youth.

JEHOVAH is saying, HE HIMSELF is witness in a marriage. Now, JESUS is witness in marriages. Children born to this married couple are JEHOVAH’s children. We are raising children for GOD. Children born in marriage are GOD’s children for which JEHOVAH/ JESUS is witness.

Malachi 2:16

¹⁶ For the LORD, the God of Israel, saith that he hateth putting away: for [one] covereth violence with his garment, saith the LORD of hosts: therefore take heed to your spirit, that ye deal not treacherously.

GOD hates ‘Divorce’ and HE hates ‘Violence’. GOD hates violence in marriage, GOD hates people who use force on their partners or forcibly get things done their way through their partners. GOD is grieved by the violence caused by husbands through abuse, hitting, beating, kicking and consuming alcohol. HE also is grieved by the contentious woman who brings grief to her husband with her words and works.

JESUS HIMSELF when HE said that the second greatest commandment is, ‘Love your neighbor as yourself’, has HE not included and covered all relations in this one commandment of love?

Mathew 22: 37 - 40

³⁷ Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind.

³⁸ This is the first and great commandment.

³⁹ And the second [is] like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself.

⁴⁰ On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets.

Wife is first neighbor to husband, husband is first neighbor to wife; child is neighbor to parent, parent is neighbor to child; sister to sister, brother to brother; and so on. When a partner in marriage is not able to understand, respect and love the other partner who is closest in relation and visibly in front of his/ her eyes, how can the partner love someone who is next in relation or a relative or a in-law or a friend or a neighbor or a poor needy person or a subordinate or a servant or a boss and above all, ‘GOD’ who is not visible to human eyes? We should ask GOD to help us love with the same true love of JESUS. Then we will love and pray for the other person’s shortcomings, weaknesses and bad habits; and for GOD’s mercy to set the other person free from Satan’s clutches and bonds. Then peace prevails in that relationship.

Romans 13: 8 – 10

⁸ Owe no man any thing, but to love one another: for he that loveth another hath fulfilled the law.

⁹ For this, Thou shalt not commit adultery, Thou shalt not kill, Thou shalt not steal, Thou shalt not bear false witness, Thou shalt not covet; and if [there be] any other commandment, it is briefly comprehended in this saying, namely, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself.

¹⁰ Love worketh no ill to his neighbour: therefore love [is] the fulfilling of the law.

In general, if we do not experience the same true love towards others as JESUS had for us, Satan tricks us into deception that we love the other person as long as everything is good. When something unexpected happens, we fall into self-pity and deceive ourselves saying that the other person no longer loves/ care us and start developing hatred towards other person, distance starts creeping quickly between the two persons, in heart and in presence. This draws us away from GOD besides enlarging the gulf between us. This is what satan wants, our downfall; the doom of a relationship GOD created. So Christians – brethren and sisters be vigilant and walk wisely, not letting the satan have an edge over us. Such situations need to be cured by fervent prayers near GOD to restore the same and also give abundant health to the relationship.

Because GOD loved us, HE forgave us and gave HIMSELF up as a sacrifice to open the door for repentance and redeem us for salvation. By showing this spotless and altruistic (unselfish) love, HE is able to conquer our hearts to the extent that we forsake our sinful lives for HIS sake and for the love that has developed within us for HIM. This is the same love, sacrifice and relationship GOD wants between husband and wife.

Part II

Genesis 2:20-23

²⁰ And Adam gave names to all cattle, and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field; but for Adam there was not found an help meet for him.

²¹ And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof;

²² And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man.

²³ And Adam said, This [is] now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.

GOD made man from mud, but GOD made woman from the side bone (rib) of a man. GOD made woman from Man’s own bone. If a man is abusing or bruising his wife, he is punishing his own bone. The man should protect his rib (wife), this is the covenant. If a husband or wife is leaving, they are destroying the covenant.

For GOD, husband and wife and their children as a family is important firstly. Therefore HE commanded man to leave his parents and cleave to his wife (likewise wife). Foreseeing circumstances of disturbances in married lives through interference of in-laws or third person(s), causing drift / misunderstandings between husband and wife, GOD wanted them to live separately so that family can be preserved without breakages and misunderstandings. If there is love and understanding in families living together with in-laws, that family has found grace in the eyes of the LORD.

Genesis 2:24

²⁴ Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.

Issues happening at home can make a slow but strong impact on a husband or wife, and ‘distance’ creeps between them. Because of some issue(s) which linger at home, husband and wife may start finding consolation near someone else outside their family, who can become the foundation for breaking the marriage made and purposed by GOD. This all happens so unknowingly.  

On the other hand, because of the disturbances between husband and wife, children get neglected in many things either by one or both parents. PARENTS ARE THE CHARACTERS EVER PLAYING IN THE MINDS OF THEIR CHILDREN. Children start imitating them or remember them when they are faced in situations ‘to do’, OR ‘not to do’. Children also develop many other moods in their lives, because of the mental agony they had gone through during their childhood, if they had a stressful childhood. Husband and wife should always remember this as parents and prayerfully face the problem, and come together in the name of the LORD. They should pray GOD to show them the solution and also provide the necessary understanding and wisdom for overcoming the situation. Then GOD provides VICTORY.

Genesis 3: 1

¹ Now the serpent was more subtil than any beast of the field which the LORD God had made. And he said unto the woman, Yea, hath God said, Ye shall not eat of every tree of the garden?

Genesis 3: 13

¹³ And the LORD God said unto the woman, What [is] this [that] thou hast done? And the woman said, The serpent beguiled me, and I did eat.

Husband and wife need to stay together and should not stay away from each other, under any circumstances. Because this is GOD’s will from the BEGINNING. Modern life is separating husband and wife in the guise of career making. Staying together has become impossible for many couples pertaining to careers and earnings of husband and wife individually. What is joined naturally by the will of GOD is now separated willfully by man. Because of this we hear many failures in marriages, illegal relationships and indecent cultural styles.

When Eve got separated from Adam for a little while, Satan took advantage of that situation and entered Eve’s life. Husband and wife face problems in their marriage when they stay away from each other (even for some time).

Serpent came to Eve when she is alone. We see Eve complaining to GOD that the serpent has ‘enticed’ her. This is what happens in the present modern day marriages where husband and wife live separately. Satan is waiting to entrap and entice each partner, when A-L-O-N-E. Believers should be aware of this fact, and husband and wife should pray GOD to keep them together. Husband and wife should pray GOD to help them with jobs which will not separate them, because the blessedness of togetherness is more profitable than any great job with huge earnings. GOD has promised that HE will bear us and feed us all through our lives. We should trust HIM, and believe HIM, and prayerfully follow HIM and allow HIM to take hold of the oars of our boat. In the beginning it may be just a boat, but we should allow GOD to take HIS time to make it a Ship.

1 Corinthians 11:7

⁷ For a man indeed ought not to cover [his] head, forasmuch as he is the image and glory of God: but the woman is the glory of the man.

Woman is the glory of man. Man is the image and glory of GOD.

1 Peter 3:7, 8

⁷ Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with [them] according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.

⁸ Finally, [be ye] all of one mind, having compassion one of another, love as brethren, [be] pitiful, [be] courteous:

So husband should remember not to offend or talk low of the woman (wife) whom GOD so perfectly planned and gave man. Likewise wife should remember that her husband is honor to her, and not offend him by painful behavior and demeaning talks.

Husband and wife should fulfill the commandment “LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR AS YOURSELF” in their lives first. If both can fulfill this properly with their first neighbor, then they will be able to fulfill with other neighbors inside and outside the house. They will set an example for others to follow. They should be always supportive and cooperative to each other for this is the will of GOD from the beginning.

Ecclesiastes 3:14

¹⁴ I know that, whatsoever God doeth, it shall be for ever: nothing can be put to it, nor any thing taken from it: and God doeth [it], that [men] should fear before him.

Not only on this earth, husband and wife are made forever. This is the reason, why parents should be cautious while marrying their sons and daughters. They should see whether the other person has the habit of reading word and praying daily. This habit can survive the problems in a married life. But in present days, parents are seeing whether the other person is well qualified / well settled/ good job/ wealthy/ landlord/ government job/ beautiful/ handsome/ fair/ tall etc. These are worldly and will not help their children in troubled times and during misunderstandings with their partners and can ruin their child’s married life.

We see many children getting their lives ruined by love marriages – only 1% or 2% are able to sustain the pressure, rest are crumbling. They start seeing their partner’s real life after marriage and then realize that they have been seeing their partner’s reel life before marriage.

As it is not possible to make the rib bone into many pieces, likewise one cannot divorce and marry someone again. Nothing can be added nor can nothing be removed, for all of GOD’s works are eternal.

This is THE DIVINE NATURE of GOD and DIVINE WISDOM of GOD.

In the next part, we will see what Moses said and what Jesus said and what they meant about marriage.

Part III

Mathew 19:3-8

³ The Pharisees also came unto him, tempting him, and saying unto him, Is it lawful for a man to put away his wife for every cause?

⁴ And he answered and said unto them, Have ye not read, that he which made [them] at the beginning made them male and female,

⁵ And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh?

⁶ Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.

⁷ They say unto him, Why did Moses then command to give a writing of divorcement, and to put her away?

⁸ He saith unto them, Moses because of the hardness of your hearts suffered you to put away your wives: but from the beginning it was not so.

JESUS is saying that it was not GOD’s wish regarding Divorce. Because what GOD joined, GOD does not like to separate. But during the time of Moses, GOD allowed the certificate of Divorce because of the hardness of their hearts, the hardships the other person might have to face from the person giving divorce in case they still stay together. This also is allowed only in one particular case of adultery (because of the more hardness of their hearts).

Mathew 19:3

⁹ And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except [it be] for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery.

GOD has been allowing divorce because of the hardness of hearts. If we see JESUS, HE has been accepting adulterers, fornicators, and people with all types of addictions. HE is forgiving them, causing repentance in them through HIS endless love and transforming their lives, enough worthy to enter GOD’s kingdom. When one tastes the love of JESUS, they will also start developing this same kind of love towards others. This is love. We can also see whether we have this kind of love within ourselves or not. The Bible can clearly show this to us when we read through GOD’s word everyday and allow GOD to transform us and also change those areas which are devoid of GOD’s characteristics. We should leave hardness of hearts and allow the softness of GOD to overtake our hardness. This is HIS true nature, and the wrath of GOD in Old Testament is not HIS complete nature.

Consider the three citations from Mark, Mathew and Revelation, when some of the Sadducees confronted JESUS about marriage, what JESUS said and other citations.

Mark 12: 18-25

¹⁸ Then come unto him the Sadducees, which say there is no resurrection; and they asked him, saying,

¹⁹ Master, Moses wrote unto us, If a man's brother die, and leave [his] wife [behind him], and leave no children, that his brother should take his wife, and raise up seed unto his brother.

²⁰ Now there were seven brethren: and the first took a wife, and dying left no seed.

²¹ And the second took her, and died, neither left he any seed: and the third likewise.

²² And the seven had her, and left no seed: last of all the woman died also.

²³ In the resurrection therefore, when they shall rise, whose wife shall she be of them? for the seven had her to wife.

²⁴ And Jesus answering said unto them, Do ye not therefore err, because ye know not the scriptures, neither the power of God?

²⁵ For when they shall rise from the dead, they neither marry, nor are given in marriage; but are as the angels which are in heaven.

Mathew 25: 34

³⁴ Then shall the King say unto them on his right hand, Come, ye blessed of my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world:

Revelation 1: 5, 6

⁵ And from Jesus Christ, [who is] the faithful witness, [and] the first begotten of the dead, and the prince of the kings of the earth. Unto him that loved us, and washed us from our sins in his own blood,

⁶ And hath made us kings and priests unto God and his Father; to him [be] glory and dominion for ever and ever. Amen.

If we see the above 3 citations from Mark 12: 18-25, Mathew 25: 34 and Revelation 1: 5, 6; we can see JESUS answering Sadducees that those persons will be like angels to their question in Mark 12. But JESUS HIMSELF in Mathew 25 said those who have been saved will be inheritors of the GOD’s kingdom (Sons of GOD). Even Revelation 1 tells this.

By this, we can understand that not all people will be made angels but that depends upon the works of the people and the judgment of GOD.

We will now see Paul’s messages on marriage. In the beginning of his ministry he stated that it is good for a man not to touch a woman and continues to conclude that it is better if a man remains unmarried. He was like a child in that stage but as he grew he became more mature, and he gives the statement finally that Marriage is honorable in all.

1 Corinthians 7:1                                                              

Now concerning the things whereof ye wrote unto me: [It is] good for a man not to TOUCH a woman.

We will see how knowledge got increased step by step in Bible. First it was revealed to Moses that GOD created heaven and Earth.

(i)                Genesis 1:1

In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth.

Then Job said that out of the empty place GOD hanged earth upon nothing.

(ii)             Job 26:7

He stretcheth out the north over the empty place, [and] hangeth the earth upon nothing.

Then to the people of this era, it was revealed to disciples of JESUS that everything was created by word and word was with GOD and word was GOD.

(iii)  John 1: 1 - 4

¹ In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.

² The same was in the beginning with God.

³ All things were made by him; and without him was not any thing made that was made.

⁴ In him was life; and the life was the light of men.

The wisdom is increased step by step.

       (iii) Hebrews 1:3

Who being the brightness of [his] glory, and the express image of his person, and upholding all things by the word of his power, when he had by himself purged our sins, sat down on the right hand of the Majesty on high;

       (iv) 2 Peter 3:5

                ⁶ Whereby the world that then was, being overflowed with water, perished:

⁷ But the heavens and the earth, which are now, by the same word are kept in store, reserved unto fire against the day of judgment and perdition of ungodly men.

Paul also confessed that he is a child in the beginning and he came to know everything one after the other.

1 Corinthians 13:9-11

⁹ For we know in part, and we prophesy in part.

¹⁰ But when that which is perfect is come, then that which is in part shall be done away.

¹¹ When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things.

When we know more and more, then we leave what we had not known earlier or this becomes minute.

Paul has given this statement below in the beginning about man and woman (before getting fully acquainted or knowing from GOD). It is not commandment from GOD; it is only Paul’s advice. We cannot take this as a commandment. But taking this statement, many pastors have preached otherwise saying that it is good to stay unmarried. We can see some denominations following this strictly. But this is not GOD’s will. Paul has uttered this when he is still a child.

1 Corinthians 7:1

¹ Now concerning the things whereof ye wrote unto me: [It is] good for a man not to touch a woman.

(Paul is saying it is good…, it is his opinion)

1 Corinthians 7:26

²⁶ I suppose therefore that this is good for the present distress, [I say], that [it is] good for a man so to be.

(Here also he supposes….and he says in the present times or present distress. He is taking his present circumstances into consideration)

1 Corinthians 7:40

⁴⁰ But she is happier if she so abide, after my judgment: and I think also that I have the Spirit of God.

(Here also he says that he thinks….).

After Paul has considerably grown up, his opinion changes about marriage

Ephesians 5:21-29

²¹ Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God.

²² Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.

²³ For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.

²⁴ Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so [let] the wives [be] to their own husbands in every thing.

²⁵ Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;

²⁶ That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word,

²⁷ That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish.

²⁸ So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.

²⁹ For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church:

JESUS gave HIMSELF up to HIS church, made it spotless and without blemish. In the same way, husband and wife relationship in a marriage is like the relationship between JESUS and HIS church.

So Paul who said that it is not good for a man to touch a woman or it is good not to marry finally declared that marriage is honorable in all.

Hebrews 13:4

⁴ Marriage [is] honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge.